Broad Oaks

Same name. Same age.

2007-09-26T11:22:00.001-07:00

Obviously, though, a more interesting life.

It's not that I'm lazy...

2007-09-26T11:17:00.000-07:00

...it's that I just don't care.

I haven't been slacking on the posting, folks. I've just felt really uninspired.

What do I need?

2007-09-11T17:53:00.000-07:00

Apparently more than I realized.

For the record, I don't dig memes. Actually, I generally despise them. They're a lazy man's way to blog. But...tell the truth, you could feel the "but" coming...this one makes me laugh out loud.

Simply Google your name plus the word "needs". Then pick out the first ten sentences that make sense.

Tip o' the cap to Scarlet for this one (by the way, she's a new add to the sidebar).

Here we go:

Tim needs to dump his lame girl: Tim's problem isn't with crack it's with his lame ass girlfriend and her pathetic family. I hope my wife doesn't find out about my girlfriend. Or the crack.

Tim needs your help, will sell wife for food. Food? No. Beer? Maybe.

Tim needs to develop a sense of trust in trustworthy adults. Trust no one.

Tim needs a shirt. Nope, just more crack.

Tim needs to be carefully managed. Finally, one that really applies.

Tim also needs to show the grass roots, the GOP establishment and the business community that he intends to give the CD 8 race 110%. I love the Grass Roots...My midnight confession...

Tim needs Edberg. Edberg? No. Vaidisova? Maybe. Sharapova? Definitely.

Tim needs to find a more acceptable way to deal with feelings of shame. Apparently, peeing one's pants is no longer an effective method.

Tim needs to make allies with associations. No, but I'd like to make allies of The Association.

Tim needs to marry, sire children, teach them to dance and play flute, write poetry, parse jurisprudence, chant Psalms, plant gardens. Good lord, man! That would seriously cut into all of my lying around time.

Perhaps I need to rethink my stance...

2007-09-10T12:08:00.000-07:00

on High School Musical.

At first I shrugged it off as suburban, white bread, homogonized crap. A futile attempt at a 21st Century Footloose or Grease.

But, perhaps there's something else to it...once you strip away the layers.

Remember in high school...

2007-09-10T12:03:00.000-07:00

...the kind of chunky, plain looking girl who danced in the talent show in an effort to feel better about herself?

Some things you just can't un-see.

Kanye vows never to return to MTV

2007-09-10T12:00:00.000-07:00

Promises, promises.

What a baby.

Time to update The List

2007-09-10T09:52:00.000-07:00

As I reconnect with my little corner of the blogosphere, I realize that it's time for a little house cleaning. I need to update several things in my sidebar. I have moved on and am reading different books now, I've found a few new blogs for daily reading and, most importantly, The List has changed.

For those who don't know the origin of The List, I'll give you a crash course. The List is simply a ranking of five famous people who you can sleep with if the opportunity would ever arise. The imprtant thing about The List is that these are freebies. Your spouse or significant other (theoretically) can't say anything about it. Presumably, they have their own List. It's a high-tech version of the teenage party game Who Would You Do?...or, perhaps more accurately, an NC-17 version of Desert Island.

The List, pop-culturally speaking, is rooted in an episode from Friends (season 3, episode 5). The episode features a cameo by Isabella Rossellini. She is most definitely not on my List.

But, who is? The most recent List dates back to my old blog. And, much like other areas of my life, things have changed. I have stumbled across several new candidates that have worked their way into The List.

Two major criteria have now become crucial in compiling The List, humor and tats. I can't explain either one, really, Especially the tattoos. Must be a fetish...I always knew I was a freak. Anyway, here's the new List:

Jennifer Love Hewitt: She was, is and always will be #1. She would have to do quite alot to drop from this lofty perch. I'm talking marry-KFed-have-a-few-mistake-babies-slip-into-a-crack-induced-coma type behavior. I would walk barefoot through 10 miles of snow just to root around in her garbage cans.

Jordana Spiro: #2 with a bullet. You may recognize her from her starring role in the TBS sitcom My Boys. She plays a sportswriter who loves football, beer and her buddies. Those with an accute sense of pop-culture will perhaps recognize her from her role in Must Love Dogs, or a 1997 episode of Buffy The Vampire Slayer (Reptile Boy). I think I actually like her because of the character she plays, though. Much like...

Lauren Graham: I think I really like Lorelai Gilmore, but either way she makes The List. I miss having her on primetime TV. Could somebody, anybody, give this woman a TV show so I can get in some quality oggling.

Kat Von D: Tattoos. Attitude. What can I say? She's just sexy. Plus, I bet she's a hell of a lot of fun to be around. I could actually expand this to include most of the girls on LA Ink, especially Hannah and Pixie. Yum. If I had the money and the opportunity I would love for her to do some ink work on me (no, that isn't code for anything).

Hayden Panettiere: Hey, she's 18 now. Don't judge me.

My job...

2007-09-10T09:15:00.000-07:00

...is not a highly guarded secret.

However, that's almost what it seems like as I read through some old posts.

Here's the back story. I worked in radio for seven years. I hosted a local talkshow in the Clarksburg area. I also did play-by-play and color commentary for high school and small college football, basketball and baseball. I got burnt out, hated my life, butted heads with bosses and decided it was time to ramble on.

I'm now the Executive Director of a living history museum in Harrison County called Fort New Salem (FNS). FNS is a representative frontier fort that depicts what community life was like in the mid-19th century. The facility is made up of about 18 authentic log cabins that date back as early as the late 1700's. All of the cabins were relocated from around North Central West Virginia.

FNS has been closed for about four years. It was once owned by Salem College (now Salem International University). There's a great deal of history there, but long story short - the college was purchased by international investors who had no desire to operate a facility that promotes Appalachian culture. A new group eventually bought the school, they deeded it over to a private Foundation who then went about looking for someone to run the day-to-day operations and spearhead fundraising. Enter me.

What do I know about running a mid-19th century Appalachian fort? The same that I knew about hosting a two-hour radio show when i took that job. Nothing. But I'm a fast learner. And, quite honestly, the biggest jobs right now are PR and fundraising. Those things are right down my alley.

Anyway, just thought I'd share a little of what was going on in my life. Here are some pics for those of you who may be interested:

I suck.

2007-09-10T08:39:00.000-07:00

A very simple, declaritive sentence. To the point. No frills. All substance.

So, I killed my old blog and threw this one up with only the best of intentions. I was going to dive right back into blogging. Ha. Ha.

I started a new job in June, which I'm loving. However, learning the ropes has been like learning to swim by being thrown into the deep end of the pool. Things are just beginning to settle down to the point where I'm able to come up for air, so to speak.

Why do I suck, you ask? Well, for starters I suck because I haven't posted anything for over two months. I also suck because I haven't even been checking in on my favorite blogs. I'm totally out of touch, man...to use the parlance of the day.

The only blog I've continued to read through all of this is Tube Talk. I keep up on it because a) it's awsome...b) Tube Talk Girl threatened my life if I didn't participate in the discussions...and c) I'm a TV fanatic.

I need to get back into the loop. I have no earthly idea how Euterpe is doing. What's Film Geek been up to? What's the news from Jennyville? Are the Apples still Sour?

Maybe I'll just pretend I went away for summer break. Now I'm back and it's time to learn what all of my classmates did on vacation. Ooh, I can't wait to tell them about how I learned to surf, and about my little brother finding a cursed tiki idol. Hawaii rules!

Gluttony...

2007-07-04T14:26:00.000-07:00

...it's the American Way!

To me, nothing says Happy 4th of July like a guy from San Jose out-eating a tiny Japanese man in a hot dog eating contest. And that name! Joey Chestnut. He should be a pro wrestler.

Here's my favorite line from the Fox Sports coverage of the big event...

Kobayashi's gastric distress was the only sour note in the tube-steak tussle, which aired nationally on ESPN.

Tube-steak tussle? Are you effing kidding me? I swear, that sounds like the title of a movie I once rented from the back corner of Video One on the Mileground in Morgantown.

God Bless America...what a country.

New addition...

2007-07-02T08:00:00.000-07:00

...to the Mountain State blogroll.

"This is your Captain speaking. If you'll look to your left, you'll notice a new link in our sidebar. Please navigate over and check out Muzings, hosted by Euterpe..."

Seems I'm not the only one dealing with a Great Transition. We shall now call this The Summer of 2007 - New Horizons (again folks, it's all about catchy titles...they're more markatable).

Oh, and kudos for getting me to brush up on my Greek Mythology.

Do you like...

2007-06-30T12:02:00.000-07:00

...kabobs, robot nipples and awkward New Zealanders?

Then have I got a show for you! You should be watching Flight of The Conchords on HBO.

Here's a taste...

*Editor's Note...the girl in the video is Roxanne from 7th Heaven

If she keeps this type of thing up...

2007-06-29T16:38:00.000-07:00

...Mika Brzezinski may just make The List. Fiery. I like that.

Watch the video...

Tip o' the cap to JDB at Infinity Ranch.

Long before Ted Bundy...

2007-06-28T10:59:00.000-07:00

...there was Harry Powers.

Powers is perhaps Clarksburg's most notorious famous son. Now, with new death penalty debate in West Virginia, Powers is being dredged up again.

JDB over at Infinity Ranch has a post up concerning Powers. It's a fascinating story. I seem to remember there being a play about Powers performed here in Clarksburg many years ago. Not sure about that, though.

I guess I take for granted, having grown up here, that everyone knows the story. Incidentally, the movie The Night of The Hunter, starring Robert Mitchum and Shelley Winters, was based on the book of the same name. The book's author, Davis Grubb, was also a native West Virginian, having been born in Moundsville.

The one problem with the new blog name...

2007-06-28T10:53:00.000-07:00

...is that it pretty much eliminates using an abbreviation.

In the old days of my original blog, I'd use the abbreviated version of the title in multiple ways. Instead of Editor's Note, I'd write RFC Note. I called my wife Mrs. RFC, so as not to divulge her real identity (she's a superhero, and frowns on that).

I'm guessing she has no desire to be called Mrs. B.O., even though I think it's damn funny.

What's in...

2007-06-28T08:45:00.000-07:00

...a name.

So, alot of folks have been asking (and by that I mean nobody), "What's with the name of your blog?"

As I was searching my mind for a name for a new blog, I kept coming up empty. No big surprise, I suppose. Although, with a head chock full o' useless pop cultural knowledge, I couldn't fathom not being able to think of something clever. One would think that somewhere along the line I had heard phrase, or a character's name or the name of a fictional town that would make for a great blog title. One would think...but one would be sorely mistaken.

As I sat down to create this new blog, I was feeling a little nostalgic. It was the downward slope of The Great Transition, after all. I was a bit wistful, to say the least. Then, it dawned on me...Broad Oaks.

In this city where I grew to manhood (or at least hope to, one day), there are many neighborhoods. These neighborhoods all have catchy names, like East View, Stealey, Chestnut Hills, Broadway, Goff Plaza, Quality Hill and Glen Elk. The neighborhood where I grew up, and where my parents still live, is called Broad Oaks.

For those of us who grew up there, we always wore it like a badge of honor. It's an average, middle-class, blue-collar neighborhood. Some homes nicer than others, but nobody in Broad Oaks was rich. At least not that we knew of. We had a little community grade school called Alta Vista, which has since been lost to unfettered school consolidation. There is a park, which has been ruined by the placement of one of those monstrous, slide-jungle gym-swingset megaplex things. (I mean, really, what good is a park where you can't play football or wiffle ball). And there used to be this little store called Joe's (actually, it was called the Broad Oaks Dairy Bar, but the kids all called it Joe's...so named because of the man who owned it for as long as any of us could remember). We would ride our bikes to Joe's to buy sodas, baseball cards and comic books...and the worst chocolate candy known to man - Sixlets.

For any writer, inspiration comes from those formative years. Most of William Kennedy's works took place in Albany. For William Faulkner, inspiration came from Mississippi...and much of his work was set in fictional Yoknapatawpha County. I'm no "writer", by any stretch of the imagination, but I am a product of my youth. And, my youth was spent in Broad Oaks...a perfect name my blog.

I'm pulling on my...

2007-06-21T18:00:00.001-07:00

...#45 jersey and getting back into the game.

OK, here's the deal. New blog, new attitude, new life. Things have been pretty topsy-turvey in my world, as of late. And, to be frank, the blog wasn't very high on the priority list. Things have changed dramatically. I've turned my back on the career that I had invested a sizeable chunk of my adult life in, and I'm doing something that is completley different. And totally exciting.

For the record, I used to host a talk radio show. I enjoyed it, although the show I was doing at the end was nothing like the show I did in the beginning. I started out trying to be "edgy" and "provocative". That, however, isn't me. There was, along the line, a metamorphosis. I realized that the show wasn't about me...it was about the community. I've lived my whole life in North Central West Virginia...and I love it here.

During the journey that was my radio career, I stepped on some toes. Fair enough. But, in an effort to be something I wasn't, I also said mean and hurtful things about people who I had no business treating that way. Bridges have been burnt. I can't take back things that were said years ago. I tried to forge ahead, change my attitude and undo some of the things I had done. Not quite sure how effective that was, though.

Why do I bring this up? Well, my inability to escape the reputation of being something that I wasn't...and to be fair, never really was...weighed on me for some time. No boo-hoo's needed, though, folks. I'm a big boy (literally and figuratively). I had a great run, but now it's over. To those who I perhaps hurt or angered with my insensitive and ignorant words, I can only say, "I'm sorry. That was never really me."

The whole, "I can't get away from my past"-struggle was only part of why I left. The biggest factor in my recent upheaval is much less complicated. I was burnt out. Badly. Morning radio is great...for a while. Then it becomes this millstone hanging from your neck. I was tired all the time, I never got to spend time with my friends or family and there were days when I barely saw my wife.

Add to the mix a working environment that many day left my stomach in knots, and you'll soon come to understand why I left the best job I've ever had.

Onward and upward, though, right? I move on to greener and, might I add, completely different pastures. I am now in the business of historical preservation/economic development/tourism. I imagine I'll be writing more on that very soon. But for now, I have a new "best job I've ever had."

The old blog is toast. I'm blowing it up. It is a representation of an old life. This is a new blog, a new me and a fresh start. Oh, don't fret...I'm still a sick, twisted smart-ass. I'm still going to post on random, stupid things. Plenty of pop culture to be found here...and ellipses abuse. Those things are...and always will be...me.

Oh, and I still love Love. Mmmm...pretty.